an insipid kiss

ever heard of bitter sweet....i always wondered how that could be but that was until i realised it a few days ago...like a hug that does not quite warm you,an applause not quite meant... an insipid kiss.thats all sometimes i am left to stare at a qualified success.perhaps i am being too finicky and conceited because what was jubiliation suddenly turns into a sigh.life has this queer habit of balancing joy with pinches of sadness and grief with silverlinings.though not altogether undesirable,i sometimes wonder if it cannot be otherwise.atleast we could savour one thing completely . thats why we niether no what is pure elation nor what is sublime grief.i say this because ultimately grief is just another feelng and is ephemeral as anything else.whether we realise this when we are under its spell is another question.
some day i would like to feel uncorrupted joy and someday unadulterated grief.
of course its cause and effect but in the necessity with which one follows the other lie all the misery of life-somerset maugham